View Story | 340 comments
Comments: Expand Shrink Hide (Always) | Indented Flat (Always)
Thank you for telling your story.
You are a champion for humanity.
A friend of mine said that she dated a wealthy young man once, & she was at the dinner table with him & his mother one night. She said something innocent, & he cold-cocked her, right there in front of his mother! His mother said nothing.
The idea that only lower class women are abused is a fiction that needs to be exposed. Women in the upper classes need to start coming out & making noise with the rest of us about it. I suspect they're afraid of losing the money & stature, but those days are over. Princess Di, though not physically abused, broke down that wall way up the socioeconomic ladder.
Thank you for your support of Pretty Bird Woman House.
Happy holidays, & a glorious New Year to you, dear nw, and to all of us.
Dean DNC ka-ching! button
by x on Wed Dec 26, 2007 at 04:42:59 AM PDT
[ Parent ]
(or maybe afraid?) to respond to domestics when they occur in wealthier households. Yet no socioeconomic class is immune.
People never lie so much as after a hunt, during a war or before an election. --Otto von Bismarck
by Ice Blue on Wed Dec 26, 2007 at 08:45:24 AM PDT
It is truly shocking and painful to hear these stories. And there are so many of them it scares me. Do we really have that fragile of a hold on our humanity? My father was an abuser and I worry all of the time that perhaps I might turn out like him. It so often happnes that the children of abusers go on to become abusers themselves. I wonder if abusers can even begin to comprehend just how far they have sunk into the depths of depravity, just how much pain they are causing people they should love. Do they really want to be regarded with the fear and loathing that eventually overcomes their victims no matter how much they once loved their tormentor? I was so surprised to read these words, especially since noweasels seems to be such a gentle, caring soul. Who would suspect that she had suffered so much and yet still found the compassion and humanity to comfort others. May God bless her and keep her and comfort her and all those who suffer abuse and may all victims find the strength and the help they need to find the better life they deserve.
by MagisterLudi on Wed Dec 26, 2007 at 10:09:04 AM PDT
Thank you for your kindest of words.
1-20-09 The Darkness Ends "Where cruelty exists, law does not." ~ Alberto Mora
by noweasels on Wed Dec 26, 2007 at 10:55:26 AM PDT
who have gone through the foster care system. All had been abused by birth parents, most had also been abused by foster parents. One of the most breath taking moments came when one of the girls said, "I don't want to grow up like my mother." (meaning, abusive) One of the older girls said, "You don't have to." Another chimed in and said, "You have the ability to choose who you want to be. If you want to be a loser you can go that way, but if you want to be a good person you can make those choices. It is all up to you." This was from the mouth of a 19 yr. old. (the other older teen was 16; the girl worrying about turning out like her mother was 13) I was IMPRESSED by these teens! They really had their acts together. (All have been through therapy, and it shows.)
by CheckM8 Groundling on Wed Dec 26, 2007 at 04:19:38 PM PDT
Thank you for his hopeful comment!
by noweasels on Wed Dec 26, 2007 at 04:28:40 PM PDT
early can make their whole lives different, and interrupt the generational cycle of abuse or dysfunctional behavior being passed on (like that sense of helplessness that so many daughters of abused mothers carry).
This is what Pretty Bird Woman House is trying to do too. They are struggling right now to just have a shelter for women who need to leave home, and their children. And to provide medical, legal, and emotional support for rape victims. But their plans include classes on parenting, classes to help women know what rights and resources they have in various situations, help getting GEDs and finding jobs, more legal advocates for women and children, and also classes for men involved in domestic violence. Anger management, that kind of thing.
Georgia Little Shields, director of PBWH, tells a really disturbing story about her daughter's husband beating her daughter. Then he was remorseful, drove her to the hospitcal, and called the police and told them to come and arrest him. So the surgeons were in there repairing his wife's shattered nose, the guy was standing in the reception area in a shirt covered with his wife's blood, and police from a couple of different agencies arrived and argued over who was supposed to be reponsible for this particular kind of case when Indians were involved. (It's a kind of bickering that goes on a lot where reservations are concerned.) Finally, one of the officers gave him back his car keys and told him to leave, that nothing was going to happen. And nothing did.
Last year, PBWH advocates assisted in bringing over a hundred cases of domestic violence before the Tribal Court. Without their help, many of those cases would have been dropped, and there would be that many more cases of nothing being done.
Vote John McCain for a Hundred Year War!
by Fiona West on Wed Dec 26, 2007 at 05:50:52 PM PDT
I thought it was important to tell my story for those reasons. Bless you.
by noweasels on Wed Dec 26, 2007 at 10:51:57 AM PDT
A few years ago, in Massachusetts, there was a traveling exhibit about the issue of abuse among upper and middle income families.
Layered over blue velvet, dead roses lie with white picket fence, framing a blue velvet pillow supporting golden handcuffs. The title came from a group of Andover women from middle to upper class homes who met to try to cope with domestic violence. They labeled their situation "Golden Handcuffs," as their abusers typically bought them expensive gifts to "make up for" the incidents of violence. This piece focuses on the lack of awareness and support for middle and upper class women suffering from domestic abuse, telling the story of their continual, forced facade. Small, ornate picture frames within the display offer statistics and examples of their predicament.
Layered over blue velvet, dead roses lie with white picket fence, framing a blue velvet pillow supporting golden handcuffs.
The title came from a group of Andover women from middle to upper class homes who met to try to cope with domestic violence. They labeled their situation "Golden Handcuffs," as their abusers typically bought them expensive gifts to "make up for" the incidents of violence. This piece focuses on the lack of awareness and support for middle and upper class women suffering from domestic abuse, telling the story of their continual, forced facade. Small, ornate picture frames within the display offer statistics and examples of their predicament.
Dump Steny Hoyer
by mataliandy on Wed Dec 26, 2007 at 11:05:15 AM PDT
wide narrow
View Story | 340 comments